Tag: Pirates of the Caribbean
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Review: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES
I found Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales appallingly touching. I nominally resist the notion of a movie made “for the fans,” but then, if you’re not making a fifth Pirates film for the fans, I don’t know who you’d be making it for. Everyone else is gone: the people who liked the first movie on…
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Destroy All Monsters: The Long Sad Tale of My Love for PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN
To you, it’s a movie, and (perhaps) a bad one. To me, it’s just one thing: blinding, blistering love.
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Destroy All Monsters: Mad As A Hatter And Half As Fun
As of today, we cleanly divide Depp’s career into two parts: before Jack Sparrow, and after. Certainly, for my generation and and a lot of other people, Johnny Depp before Jack Sparrow (and, arguably, including at least the first instance of Jack Sparrow) was one of Hollywood’s rarer, braver gifts: an idiosyncratic, deeply committed performer…
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Review: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES
Why is the rum gone? Screened in 3-D, as it was shot. At last we are arriving at films that were conceived and directed for 3-D, rather than the hatchet up-conversions that have plagued us for 2 years. Now, the only question remaining: why on earth would anyone want to see a Pirates of the…
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Review: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: AT WORLD’S END
Arrrrrrrh Wars “Are there pirates? Is the Pope Polish? You bet your sweet ass there are pirates. There are pirates overflowing every single frame of this movie. There are good pirates, bad pirates, friendly pirates, sexy pirates, sleazy pirates, clever pirates, stupid pirates, tall pirates, midget pirates, men pirates, women pirates, monkey pirates, white pirates,…
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Review: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN’S CHEST
Prevent Movie Piracy Be careful what you wish for, the wise man said, and just because we all spent the summer of 2003 hoping that they would do something — anything! — to further the adventures of one Captain Jack Sparrow, doesn’t mean that any such effort would necessarily succeed at the mighty feat of…
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Review: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL
A Pirate’s Life For Me This was my original review for Pirates of the Caribbean 1, presented unedited. Sorry, Gore. I figured it out later. Hidden behind a cringe-inducingly lengthy title, crappy Disney theme park ride origins, and a directorial pedigree almost as low as Michael Bay’s, Pirates of the Caribbean somehow still manages to be…